January 1, 2008
The “Loaded Weapon”
Ever since I started living with my boyfriend I’ve caught him masturbating. At the beginning he would watch porno and masturbate, I told him this really upset me and he said that he wouldn’t do it again. He also eventually got rid of all the porno.
Well everything was good - or at least I think it was, until recently I have caught him masturbating. He doesn’t do it to porn, he does it when he goes it bed. (We don’t go to bed at the same time; I go to bed much later) Anyways I confronted him about this and told him that it hurts me that he would rather masturbate than be with me. Than a week later, I caught him again. I explained to him again, that I feel that I can’t trust him (not that he would cheat, just that he is going to masturbate again) and I told him that it really hurts me and upsets me that he chooses to do this, than be with me. I feel like it’s my fault. Maybe he doesn’t find me attractive. He says that he does, but I am unsure. I doubt our relationship now. Don’t get me wrong, he is an amazing man and I love him more than anything. Really the only thing wrong is this. I just don’t know what to do. I don’t really have anyone to talk to about this.
Please help. Thank You.
